English- what an odd language

English has some very strange rules to it, and some strange words that come out of it.

You have one goose & one moose, but you don’t have two meese.

One is a house, one is a mouse, one is a louse, but you’re not going to find two mouses or louses.  And you’ll never have two hice.

You might see an ox, a fox, or a box.  You’ll even see two oxen, but never two foxen or boxen.  And oxes?  Nope.

One foot is a foot but two feet are not foots.
One boot is a boot but two boots are not beet or beets, they’re boots.

A deer is a deer and two deer are two deer, but a steer is a steer and two steers are not two steer.

We hang up the phone even though we put it down. Why don’t we say we hang down the phone?
And speaking of phone, it’s spelled with a ‘ph’ but pronounced with an ‘f’. Isn’t that phun?
The words ‘cough’, ‘tough’ and ‘enough’ end with an ‘f’ sound, but the word ‘though’ doesn’t.
When something is out in the open is it out or is it in?
And you might lose a tooth or even a couple of teeth, but adding a second booth doesn’t give you beeth

Both a moth and a sloth can eat broth with froth, but why doesn’t ‘both’ rhyme with moth, sloth and froth?If a ‘tune’ can be ‘sung’, why can’t ‘moon’ be ‘mune’?

If you look to see who took a book from the nook, can you lake to saw who take a bake from the nake?

English numbers are even crazier:
1. The words ‘one’ and ‘won’ rhyme, but only one of them starts with ‘w’.
2. ‘Two’ has a ‘w’, but so do ‘twin, twice and twenty’, but why don’t we pronounce the ‘w’ in ‘two’?
3. ‘Three’ becomes ‘thirty’ in the ordinal sense, but why isn’t it ‘threty’ or ‘threety’?
4. There’s a ‘u’ in the number four, but multiply it by ten and it loses ‘u’ (forty).
5. ‘Five’ loses its ‘v’ in ‘fifth’ and ‘fifty’ but unlike ‘live’, its plural is ‘fives’ and not ‘fifes’.
6. ‘Six’ is pretty straightforward, except for its tricks; when being pronounced, it can be confused with ‘sex’.
7. Since ‘seven’ rhymes with ‘heaven’, where is its ‘a’?
8. ‘Eight’ has to be the strangest of all, we get it from German, ‘gh’ and all.
9. ‘Nine’ is fine just as it is (I struggled to find something to add to this list, but it escaped my wit, so it must be dismissed).
10. ‘Ten’ won’t get away so easily, its ordinal version when multiplied by itself doesn’t follow to pattern of its younger siblings tenth, twentieth, thirtieth, fortieth, fiftieth, sixtieth, seventieth, eightieth, ninetieth), if it did it would be the ‘tenthieth’.

People can be incompetent or competent, disorganized or organized, inelegant or elegant, misinformed or informed. Instructions can be imprecise or precise. Food & water can be impure or pure.But what’s the opposite of to ‘disrupt’? Do we ‘rupt’ something? Is someone who isn’t discombobulated ‘combobulated’? Is the opposite of inept ‘ept’? What does a ‘gruntled’ postal worker do? Can you be ‘chalant’, or ‘sheveled’? If digging something up is to ‘unearth’, then are you ‘earthing’ something when you bury it? Are things that aren’t ‘immaculate’ ‘maculate’? If you’re not ‘discouraged’, are you ‘couraged’? People might be ‘comatose’ if they’re asleep, so when we’re awake, are we ‘incomatose’? When you tear something down you ‘dismantle’ it, so maybe building something is to ‘mantle’ it. If you can ‘deny’ something, can you also ‘ny’ it? When you undress, you ‘disrobe’, so maybe getting dressed is to ‘enrobe’. Someone who goes crazy might be ‘deranged’, so a sane person must be ‘ranged’, right? And is the opposite of ‘dismay’ ‘may’?

If something is ‘out of whack’, then what is ‘whack’?
And why do ‘flammable’ and ‘inflammable’ mean the same thing?

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